Yoga and Hiking

Part of my commitment to my new lifestyle is moving and relaxing. I've been making some slow but steady progress in those departments. I've started wearing and syncing my Fitbit Flex every day. I've learned a few things: I average at just about 6,000-7,000 steps per day, I sleep just a little under 8 hours per night, and I don't move much when I sleep.

What else... I spontaneously joined my teammates in an outdoor yoga event after work one night. It was the moment where I chose to get moving instead of drive home and sit. It was a tough decision because my back was really killing me (I have scoliosis... and back pain and stiffness will keep me from moving around, which in turn causes more back pain and stiffness, go figure). However, I was very proud of myself for making the right choice. After yoga, I went to enjoy a burger with my friends - protein style, no sauce, with a side of broccoli. Yay!

Last week, I told myself... Yoga on Thursday morning before work or bust! I announced my intentions to a teammate so that I could have some sort of non-self accountability. I woke up with significantly less sleep than usual and felt pretty crappy - I'm not a morning person, at all. But I honored my promise to myself and got to the gym. It gave me a wonderful feeling - physically and mentally - all day.

Lastly, I went on a one day camping trip with my friends this weekend. I went on two hikes, one in the evening we arrived and one in the morning before we left. It felt great to experience the quiet adventurousness of being in nature was so relaxing. At night, the clouds rolled in and I could see their outlines in the remnants of twilight. Even though it really hid the stars, it felt so amazing because the moist air, cool breeze, and fire pit really reminded me of being on the beach in San Diego again. It gave me a bit of nostalgia.

I feel like I am finding opportunities to become more active and I'm finally giving that aspect of my life more attention. I remember how strong, flexible, and good I felt in my mid-20's when I used to practice yoga 3-4 times per week. Even though that is not something I can accommodate at this time, I am finding other ways to move more often and be more active. I take that as a small victory over a giant mental roadblock.

Lettuce Cups

My best friend gave me a lovely present... a healthy cookbook titled, " Eat What You Love Everyday." There's over 200 great tasting recipes that are low sugar, fat, and calories. It's been really neat reading the information and flipping through the books to try to find some easy and tasty recipes to try out.

First one: Moo-Shu Lettuce Wraps (modified)

Sauce
2 tbsp reduced sodium Soy Sauce (or Liquid Aminos substitute), 1 tsp Sesame Oil, 1 tsp freshly minced Ginger (END HERE if you're not eating sugar) 2 tbsp Hoisin Sauce.

Moo-Shu
Cook 1lb Lean Ground Turkey in a large nonstick skillet, add Sauce to skillet, simmer 3 minutes, remove from heat. Cover & microwave 3-4 cups bagged Coleslaw Mix and 4 thinly sliced Green Onions on high for 3 minutes when Turkey is cooking, add to meat & sauce, add 1/2 cup chopped Water Chestnuts, add Pepper to taste.

Rip off the springy leaves of a head of Butter Lettuce, fill them up with delicious Moo-Shu, and there you are! I call them Lettuce Cups instead of wraps because it just seems more fitting. I brought this delicious meal to lunch at work today - my coworkers were very impressed. So fancy!

I reserved the Hoisin Sauce for my husband to enjoy with his little Lettuce Cups because the #1 ingredient of Hoisin Sauce is usually sugar, and modified food starch tends to make an appearance about 75% down the ingredient list as well. Unnecessary carbs and sugar have no place in The No Food Fun Life. I also increased the coleslaw mix amount from 3 to 4 cups to bring my veggie and fiber game up a notch.

This awesome and great-for-me lunch was relatively easy to make. But that doesn't mean I had it easy. Recently, the microwave in our work Bistro was moved to a new location. It used to be right next to the soda machines - which was perfect because that's also the water machine, and I'm not a soda drinker. It was very mundane and simple microwaving my food there. Now, it lives next to this wall of COOKIES! A line of freshly baked, ready and waiting, luring and enticing COOKIES! WTF.

For one minute and thirty seconds, I stood there fantasizing about eating one of each kind of cookie - except Oatmeal Raisin *ew*. Then the microwave went ding! and I grabbed my nutritious lunch and hightailed it out of there before I came to any regrettable decisions. Success.

I wasn't perfect though. My friend came back to work after a trip to Boston and she brought back these Mexican Roasted Almonds - coated with cocoa powder, cinnamon, and a slight sugar glaze. I ate a total of four. So, I wasn't perfect today - and I admit it to all of you and to myself - but I don't feel bad about it. I still feel that I triumphed over the wall of cookies... and enjoying 4 heavenly Mexican Roasted Almonds brought back home from a long journey by a much missed friend is OK in my books.

Beef & Broccoli

I made Beef & Broccoli today from a super simple recipe that one of my students gave to me. I modified the recipe that she gave me to make it acceptable for The No Food Fun Life. I removed the cornstarch, used twice as much broccoli, and added roasted sesame seeds. The results were tasty!

I'll jot down the general recipe, and then let you know how I tweaked it to get as close as I could to no added sugar, carbs, or starches.

Sauce
2 tbsp Soy Sauce (or Liquid Aminos substitute), 2 tbsp Oyster Sauce, 1 tbsp Rice Vinegar, 1 tbsp Sherry Cooking Wine, 1 tbsp Cornstarch (which I omitted). Combine everything, marinate about 1lb Beef slices. I added roasted sesame seeds for fun.

Recipe
Stir fry a whole bunch of Broccoli (like 4 heads of florets) with a sprinkle of salt & pepper, after a few minutes drizzle a bit of Sesame Oil (mostly for aroma & flavor) and continue to stir fry until tender. Remove Broccoli. Add beef & Sauce... stir fry until beef is cooked, add the broccoli back in until everything is coated in sauce and hot (I modified this last step).

One thing I learned from this cooking adventure is that sugar is lurking in everything that makes stuff delicious. Oyster sauce is in a lot of Chinese cooking as a base for many sauces. No wonder it's tasty - it's got 5g of sugar per tablespoon. Two tablespoons add up to almost half of the recommended 25g of added sugar that a healthy adult woman should aim to stay below per day. And, usually, people overlook sauces and condiments when thinking about their daily consumption. So, it can really sneak its way into our daily intake.

So... to combat the sugar and cornstarch, I got a little creative. As stated above, I didn't add the cornstarch to the sauce - it has 7g carbs per tablespoon. Next, I cooked the broccoli, set it aside, cooked the beef & marinade... then I removed the meat with tongs and left the sauce simmering in the wok. I diluted 1 tbsp cornstarch in cold water and added it to the sauce and let it boil a bit. Once it thickened, I poured it out into a bowl - like gravy.

I ate my beef with the minimal sauce that had soaked into it with an oversized helping of yummy broccoli. It made me feel not so worried/guilty about the sugar - and my husband was able to enjoy the full flavors and thick sauciness of a pretty good dish of Beef & Broccoli. Solid compromise.

Success... and I've got enough for tomorrow's lunch at work - sweet! Pun intended.

Impromptu Potluck

As mentioned before, my fun-filled work place is hard on The No Food Fun Life. Earlier this week, my team decided that we should do a potluck today.

I bought all the ingredients to prepare either Beef & Broccoli or Braised Short Ribs. Either dish would give me a non-carb option. This is not my first potluck rodeo... people looooooove making and sharing dishes with oodles and oodles of delicious carbs. I didn't want to throw myself into the potluck predicament without a safety net.

Now, also as mentioned earlier, life throws curve balls. As documented in my previous posts, I've been deeply afflicted by the PMS party mix from the underworld this week. I was in no mood to cook last night, and even less mood to do so this morning. Uh oh.

So, I went to the grocery store right before work and bought a Meat, Cheese, & Crackers platter. Classy fingerfood... score. Next, I quickly grabbed an Apple Harvest Salad: baby lettuces, apple, chicken, cheese, and sunflower seeds. Yum! That way, if I rolled up to this potluck and there was nothing for me to eat, I wouldn't feel compelled to just give in and eat whatever was there. I feel like I played it pretty smart today. *pat on the back*

Lo, and behold! I arrived to the following: 3 dozen donuts (seriously!), cookies, enchiladas, lasagna, and slutty brownies (heaven-on-earth triple layers - brownie, oreos, chocolate chip cookies). I set out my little platter, stocked a little plate of salami & cheese and dug into my salad. I still ate with the rest of my team and socialized, chatted, and stuffed my face... I just did it on my own terms. I felt pretty powerful.

My teammates are all very supportive. I'd say 50% knows exactly what I'm doing in regards to changing my health and PCOS... and the other 50% thinks I'm extremely picky, healthy, and/or strange. Haha. But they accept it.

In fact! I got three of them to help me eat donuts and brownies vicariously through them. I would take a giant inhale of a particularly good looking Krispy Kreme to get all the deliciousness up my nostrils... and then I'd watch them take a big bite. OMG... if you've never done this... DO IT. I don't know if I'm crazy or if it's like a true scientific thing... but smelling it and then watching someone else eat it is REALLY CLOSE to eating it. I'm not joking! I'd even ask them to take a 2nd bite and go "mmmmmmmm" and then I'd make the same noise - and I swear I felt like I experienced the entire thing myself.

DON'T JUDGE ME!!!!

Today, I am in love with my teammates for supporting my journey, for not judging me, and for being such good-sport weirdos!!! hee hee... I consider this potluck a success because 1) I didn't give up when plans got derailed 2) I played it way smart 3) I found support from others and 4) I had fun! :)

Success, indeed.

A Sweet Treat

I had a rough day. According to my menstrual cycle tracker and my ob/gyn, today should be the start date of my period. It hasn't come yet - but I feel all the symptoms, and then some.

I am experiencing some intense fatigue. I hesitate to tell people that I'm feeling fatigued anymore, because the common misconception is that I'm just tired. I'm not TIRED... I'm not hitting a mid-day slump. This is different and comes in many forms. Many people do associate fatigue with physical exhaustion, but fatigue can also show itself as depression or the inability to concentrate. In fact, a lack of energy can decrease your ability to function physically, mentally, or emotionally. But, yes, I do feel completely exhausted.

Next, the PMS party mix of symptoms: back pain, headache, breast tenderness, cramp-iness, bloating, and the lovely *blah* emotion - you know, that feeling when you wake up and think to yourself, what's the point? and then proceed to crawl back into a mental hole, hoping to stop life from happening there. I dreaded going to work - thinking that I couldn't face my teammates. I thought: Why bother, they don't even like me... they're so annoying... they won't understand... they're just going to be all positive and tell me to feel better... I can't sit through any meetings! Um, these are the same lovely people I invite over to my home, eat with, get drunk with, watch movies with, walk to taco trucks with, sing karaoke with, bare my soul to...! Obviously, I was afflicted with some serious blues. Although, that last part was true... I ditched every single one of my meetings today. It felt great.

All of the symptoms are so intense. That is also a curse of PCOS. In fact, sometimes women with PCOS are diagnosed with PMDD  - Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder - which is extended, and sometimes disabling, PMS. Which, of course, can be true, but if the diagnosis ends there without testing for PCOS, that woman can suffer forever and just blame it on the wrong disorder. When my hormones were regulated by birth control pills, I never had symptoms like this. The most would be some back pain with a headache... and sometimes light cramps. Every time I experience a non-hormone induced/regulated period - it's like the world is ending. And what's worse is that... I don't know what's not working right, but it will just drag on for days.

Aside from the PMS horror show, today marked a successful first week in The No Fun Food Life. With the exception of 1/2 cup of brown rice/millet/barley, 4 croutons, and 2 pieces of spiral pasta... I had refrained from indulging in sugars, carbs, and starches. It was no easy feat... but I am proud of myself.

Since I woke up feeling so extra crappy - I made a little pact with myself. If I could make it through the day and manage to not hunt down 15 brownies and inhale them all... I would treat myself. I stuck it out through the day, and went over to a hip little cafe after work. I ordered a large chamomile tea and 2 macarons: almond and raspberry. Oh boy, did I savor them. I took little bites and chewed very slowly. I think it took me ten minutes to consume the two tiny little delicate desserts. They tasted heavenly. *ahhhhhhhh*

I'm glad that I rewarded myself and, if anything, I feel like it has reinforced my dedication. I can indulge responsibly. And... I deserved it! Here's to another successful week! :)

Cartoon & Cereal Day

The break rooms at my work are usually stocked with fairly nutritiously mindful cereals: Kashi whole grain varieties, other whole grain and bran flakes, and... the highly coveted... Honey Nut Cheerios. Seriously, people hoard the Honey Nut Cheerios on their desks and in their drawers.

What you see on the left is a for realz whiteboard announcement. My work is always coming up with fun-filled themed days to boost morale and reinforce our culture. Cartoon & Cereal Day? All of our favorite childhood cereals?? People loved it! They were going bonkers for it! Random people were walking around shouting at each other, Hey! Did you see all the "good stuff," "sugary stuff," "real cereal," etc. over there?

What was music to most of my coworkers' ears was like nails on a chalkboard for me. There I was... days into my new No Fun Food Life and all the crème de la crème of crunchy breakfast goodness were on full display, pushed by the excited masses, and free for the endless taking. Lucky enough for me, I have been weaned off of my childhood addiction to commercial cereals for years now.

The refined, simple carbs saturated with sugar or high fructose corn syrup that we dutifully shoveled into our faces as children has no place in the diet of a woman afflicted with PCOS.

Simple carbs are easy carbs - easily processed and absorbed into your bloodstream, that is. All of the energy is absorbed immediately - turning into a quick and temporary rush - causing your blood sugar to spike and then crash. Adding sugar into the mix will just increase the intensity exponentially. It'll send your blood glucose and insulin levels on a wild swing within a very short amount of time.

Whenever I take the simple carbs + sugar roller coaster ride, this is how I feel: Delighted, Jazzed, Satiated, Full, Guilty, Thirsty, Tired, Hungry, Grumpy (listed in the order of their appearance). Think about the times when you were hungry and you ate a glazed doughnut, a fruity danish, a chocolate muffin, some pancakes and syrup - and nothing else - did you feel the effects of the roller coaster? Take that roller coaster frequently and long enough... your brain and pancreas will stop communicating correctly.

Women with PCOS already experience communication problems between their brains, pancreas, and ovaries. We don't need to contribute to the problem. There were many who were ready to call me a hater because I didn't embrace Cartoon & Cereal Day - "... but cereal is part of a complete breakfast!" "... they're fortified with vitamins and stuff!" "... you're supposed to eat the most calories at breakfast anyway so you have all day to burn it off!" But as my doc had pointed out - I don't have a nutrition problem, I don't have an eating problem... I have PCOS.

Don't get me wrong. I know we all need carbohydrates and sugars to live and, in their many forms, they are in everything. They're in fruits, vegetables, and even dairy products. The glucose/insulin swing can be moderated by the presence of the fiber and protein found in a balanced meal - it'll soften the blow and provide your body a longer-sustained and more stable energy.

Whole fruits and vegetables have the natural carbohydrates, sugars, and starches that we want and need to eat, and they are neatly prepackaged with fiber intact. So, add a handful of nuts, a glass of soy/almond milk, or a hard boiled egg, and there goes your complete meal for breakfast.

The Eye-Opener

Just a short story about this turning point in my mindset. In my life, really. After being told to embark on my No Fun Food Life by the doc, I got in the car and called my husband. I had been busy. I had a dentist appointment that morning. I went into work on my day off for an important meeting. Now, it's almost dinner time - and I had nothing at home. We agreed to eat Thai food. I didn't think twice. A new lifestyle? That's on tomorrow's To-Do List.

It had been raining all day. I live in Las Vegas and we have summertime thunderstorms during monsoon season. I went to a local bomb-dot-com Thai restaurant and picked up our respective fave dishes. I got him the spicy noodles with chicken. I got the Panang Curry with duck. Time to go home and eat my final fun-filled supper.

I took the on-ramp to the freeway at a very low speed... about 20-25mph, maybe? I'm in the right lane, negotiating a right-hand curve at a slight decline. I was maybe a quarter way through the on-ramp when I felt the back end of my Toyota Camry fishtail to the left. I began to slide just a teeny tiny bit. I thought to myself - Don't Panic. Don't stomp on the brakes. That's the worst thing you can do.

I'm really proud of myself because I didn't stomp on the brakes. I just let go of the gas pedal and thought I could maybe sail back into traction... Unfortunately, it didn't happen that way. I began sliding into the next lane. I know there are cars behind me in both lanes... whether they were paying attention and avoided me, or they were just far enough away, I'm never going to recall. I realized that I was going to slide off the on-ramp on the far side! That side had a steep gravel embankment. I didn't want to fall down on that side.

At that moment... I decided to take action. I was done sliding and waiting for the traction that didn't come. I lightly tapped on the brake pedal to test out what exactly would happen. And yes, the tales are true. I quickly went into a tight spinning circle. I let go and tried to maneuver the steering wheel to just kind of go with the spin... and all the while I just gently tapped on the break like... every second or so. *NOTE: Time does act very funny when you're in a situation like this*

I spun around maybe 1 full circle... and I went back towards the right side of the on-ramp. That side had a shoulder that went into flat gravel... so it didn't scare me very much. I was hoping to go into it so I could stop. Another half circle... and my car stopped. I must have finally stomped on the brake. I turned on the hazards and turned off the radio.

I just sat there watching the cars drive past me. I'm mostly off the lane so I'm not obstructing traffic. I did think to myself - Geez, really? Nobody's going to stop and see if I'm ok? I got over it. I mean... I was going very, very slow when it all happened. It probably looked like no big deal to the other drivers.

I had a few options. I figured I could call AAA, but... nothing seemed wrong with my car - I just lost control. I could call my husband... but send him out to the crazy slick roads and do what? Come get me? Leave my car there? Call my friends and vent or feel better... but then I'll just be a roadside hazard and probably get worked up again reliving the whole thing. I checked my breathing, my pulse, and my general sanity. I felt fine. I was already over it.

I waited for the on-ramp red light... at which time the cars stopped getting on... and I let go of the brakes, applied some gas tentatively, everything felt ok, and turned myself around to get on the freeway. I got home ok - and the food was still hot.

Here are my post-traumatic, 20/20 hindsight, dig-way-deep reflections. I almost died because of my poor food choices. NO! JUST KIDDING!



More seriously... I realized that this was a perfect metaphor for life. Sometimes, it rains. Life can be full of beautiful, wonderful, miraculous things that feel as warm and radiant as the sun itself. However, things happen. Life happens. It just rains sometimes... and the road you're on is slick and dangerous. The traction gets ripped out from under you and you're left spinning out of control. But when you're done watching the blurry world whiz by - maybe when the spinning somehow slows down a bit or you take that moment of fear, courage, or pure survival instinct to act. You are choosing to take back the control. You can stop.

How you stop is not always your choice. Where you stop can seem even scarier than the spinning! However, when it all comes to a halt... you can get back on the road. Knowing there are people who would've come to the rescue, people who would've cared if I called, or roadside assistance that I pay for in case of emergencies... that helped. I was the only person inside that car... but I was not alone.


That's pretty much exactly how I feel about what I need to do now to get my health back on track. I'm done spinning and it is NOT on tomorrow's To-Do-List. It started 3 days ago - and I'm proud that I've been on the road for those 3 days.

I've recently witnessed life raining heavily on a close friend and a close family member. Their stories, hardships, and courage really inspire me. They inspire me to love deeper and to grow wiser. Above all, they show me what it means to dare to hold on tighter to the hopes and dreams that keep slipping just past our fingertips. Even though our roads are all different... I feel the road to any recovery is the same. I wish for them strength, love, and peace to see them through the dark and gloomy days. But I hope that they also know they are never alone... and the sun will shine again.

The Beginning

This week marks the beginning of a massive lifestyle change. I was told by my doctor to eat my way to good health... No sugar. No carbs. No starches. Not like, eat brown rice instead of white rice. More like, don't eat any rice. It's not forever, it's until I can become PCOS symptom-free. Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome is a common endocrine (or hormone-related) disorder that affect many women of reproductive age.

Symptoms include infrequent, absent, or prolonged menstrual periods, excess hair growth, acne, and obesity. Everyone's experienced one of the above at some time or another. While it may not mean you have PCOS... if you have it, you will know because you will read the first sentence in this paragraph and then multiply the intensity and duration by 20x. That's how it feels. I gained 25lb in 5 months with no diet, activity, or lifestyle change. I got a face full of purple painful acne, random facial & body hair, and I went 8 months without a menstrual period. My testosterone level was sky-high.

The exact cause of PCOS is unknown. Early diagnosis and treatment along with weight loss may reduce the risk of long-term complications, such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease, and infertility. And probably general unhappiness and low self-esteem caused by all the awful symptoms, right?

Complications
- High blood pressure
- Cholesterol and lipid abnormalities, such as elevated triglycerides or low high-density lipoprotein (HDL) cholesterol, the "good" cholesterol
- Metabolic syndrome
- Nonalcoholic steatohepatitis — a severe liver inflammation caused by fat accumulation in the liver
- Infertility
- Sleep apnea
- Depression and anxiety
- Abnormal uterine bleeding
- Cancer of the uterine lining (endometrial cancer), caused by exposure to continuous high levels of estrogen
- Gestational diabetes or pregnancy-induced high blood pressure

Anyway, I'm just writing this down to announce my renewed dedication to getting healthy. The possible complications of prolonged exposure to the hormonal, physical, and mental effects of PCOS are quietly scaring me out of my socks on a subconscious level. I need to take back my health and move on with my life. I just turned 30 this year and I want the prime years of my life to feel like it. My husband and I are ready to begin the next chapter of our life and this disorder... syndrome... disease... will not dictate my life.

I'm ready to explore how to navigate daily life with an overhaul of the following components: eating, moving, and relaxing. :)