Confession Of A Dumpling Addict

It's time I come clean... I have been flying under the radar with this guilty pleasure. Dumplings are wrapped in really high-carb skins.

1) I ate dumplings during my vacation - which I documented and is completely normal.
2) On the day we left to drive home to Vegas... I stopped at Dumpling Inn (the BEST dumpling shop in San Diego) and bought dumplings & steamed pork buns for the drive.
3) Half a week back into the real life, I left work one day craving them. I was desperate. So, I went to the grocery store and bought a bag of Ling Lings. I'm not proud of it.
4) They don't cut it. So, this past weekend I went to the Chinese supermarket and bought what I needed to make my own. I made dozens and dozens of them. I've been eating them everyday for FOUR DAYS now!

Pork Dumpling Recipe *NOT No Fun Food Life Approved*
Mix together 3lb. ground pork, white parts of 1 bunch of Green Onions, a handful of Spinach leaves chopped, a lot of Garlic to your desire chopped, 1 cup of Shiitake Mushrooms chopped, 1/4 cup Soy Sauce, and 1/8 cup Toasted Sesame Oil. Chop up like 4 cups of Napa Cabbage, sprinkle with some salt, work with your hands to encourage osmosis, squeeze the water out of the cabbage and add into mixture. Mix everything together well.

Use dumpling skins, add dollops of the meat mixture to the center, wet the edges and solidly squeeze/crimp together to skin to fully contain the meat mixture in the middle. Pop into boiling water in batches, boil about 10 minutes or until they float and puff up.
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I have a problem. I am a dumpling addict!!! I decided I had to come out with my terrible secret so I can be held accountable and stop. I must stop! I have to get back on track this month and stick to my guns. I've started working on the physical fitness aspect, so I can't let the food part slide.

On another note, while I was at the Chinese supermarket, I saw something that struck me as a sign of good luck for the baby journey. I went to buy White Rabbit Candy to add a bit of festivity to my home in preparation for Chinese New Year. And when I got to the shelf of White Rabbit Candy, there was a single box of Ginger Candy wedged right up front. Significance? Ginger Candy is a popular item among pregnant women suffering from nausea. So... I'll take that as a good luck sign for a little "dumpling" this Year of the Sheep! LOL... and yes, I bought it. Don't judge me.

So far, the baby journey has had its ups and downs. Of course there's like that disappointment when it doesn't happen each month, but on the positive side it has brought Will and me closer together. It's fun to share in the little moments when we talk about the future. And twice this month I had dreams that I was pregnant! Maybe more omens of great things to come??? I hope so! tehehehehe

Brunettes Bring It On

I finished my second 5K of 2015... Brunettes Bring It On! I woke up yesterday to a damp, cold, and gloomy morning. The course was riddled with duck/goose poop but we managed to finish and I felt so proud at the finish line! If I hadn't already paid (I get reimbursed by work only if we complete the race) and known that my friends were there... I would've just flopped back into bed! I'm so lucky they've absorbed me into their amazing group of support and motivation. :)

During the race, I told my friend that I had a looooooog day ahead of me. I was going to work for 7 hours, I had a presentation to give, and then a team building event at the opposite end of town that night. I was really daunted by the length of the day, but I told her that I was glad I hadn't ditched the race because it was the one thing that I was doing solely for myself. Yeah!

The 5Ks are pushing me to challenge myself mentally and get more fit physically, I love it! They're also inspiring me to embrace the "outside" more - I stay inside WAY TOO MUCH. So, I'm gonna hit the 5Ks until summer comes along... then we'll reassess the weather conditions, lol. Hey, it's the desert! Give me a break here.

So... the whole exercise part was down pat this Saturday... but the food part got away from me like a runaway train. After the 5K, I was famished! So, my friend and I ordered Jimmy Johns subs at work, yum! The turkey sub with lettuce, tomatoes, sprouts, cucumbers, and mayonnaise on French bread was HEAVEN... *drool*... ummm and then I ate a bag of chips. Then we walked like 5 blocks or so to our other work building and gave a presentation... and it was all hot... and I suddenly felt super tired and I needed to get up in front of the room and present... so I drank half a cup of Coke. I never drink soda!! I feel so bad... but it's not even the end. That evening, at the team building at the bowling alley, I ate chicken fingers & fries and drank a Pepsi!!!! Yeah... just carbing and sugaring all freaking day long. :(

So, this taught me a lesson. Next time if I have to work or be out & about after an endurance event, I'm going to pack myself some No Fun Food Life approved meals/snacks so I won't be in this situation again. Lesson learned.

Back to Real Life

I was pretty relaxed on the No Fun Food Life for the 2nd week of my vacation, but I managed to get in a few mindful meals. I won't bore everyone with the details - mostly because I don't remember. LOL

I did manage to settle back into the real life with a bang! I completed the Zappos Community & Downtown 5K with a few of my friends! It was overall a positive experience, even though I complained towards the middle. There's a part where you turn around and basically complete the entire thing backwards to complete the 5K, and we kept turning and twisting and the turnaround spot was nowhere in sight! But we finally reached the midway turnaround point, I reached the end, and I even managed to pick up the pace to a light trot and put on a million dollar smile for the camera!! LOL

I look forward to the next one tomorrow!! WOOHOO!

SoCal Vacation _ Part Two

I ate the delicious Ham & Cheese bun for breakfast, yum! Then, my cousin and I headed out to LAX to pick up a friend from the airport and ate delicious Korean dumplings and I had a really amazing Royal Milk Tea afterwards. No regrets! Especially since we walked The Strand from Venice Beach to Santa Monica... I don't know the actual distance we walked, but we were there for almost 2 hours. My Fitbit hit 10,000 steps before we reached the end of the trek, but when I went to sync it with my app, it only tracked like 164 steps... Arg!

After our epic walk, we went to Tender Greens in Marina Del Rey to enjoy a light and healthy dinner. I ordered the Chicken Cobb Salad and she had the Tuna Nicoise... let me tell you... if you've never eaten at a Tender Greens before, you need to make your way over to one. Pronto! Hands down, the best salad I may have ever eaten in my entire life. We went back to her place and had a nice relaxing evening. I started watching a series called Resurrection on Hulu, and now I'm completely hooked. I spent the night watching this riveting show, drank hot Raspberry Leaf Tea, and munched on a banana & train mix.

Thursday

I awoke and ate that Milk Pudding bun... then I ate a piece of my cousin's Red Bean & Mochi bun... and at that time I felt a little unsettled. I think the sugar & carbs hit me a little too fast first thing in the morning. I take my Metformin after breakfast, so maybe that contributed a bit. We met my parents for lunch... I didn't keep track of what I ate, but there were definitely rice cakes, steamed pork buns, and Shanghai noodles involved. I didn't feel too bad about it - it was a great meal with my family. Afterwards, I had a Chai Tea Latte while chatting with my cousin. It was way sweeter than I anticipated... and it did make me feel a bit guilty. First tally of vacation woe - meh.

I left to meet up with a friend from my hometown for a long stroll around a park that she regularly runs at. We did some of the course exercises that are displayed on the signs around the track for a warm up, and then walked and talked for 3 laps. I'm not sure how far we walked, but the sun had set by that time and we headed to dinner. Second tally of vacation woe - we ate pho (Vietnamese noodles)... they're rice noodles and I'm sure SUPER high in carbs. Funny enough, I feel nothing about the egg rolls... lol. And then, I had a Jasmine Milk Tea with half sugar/half boba for dessert as we chatted into the evening.

Friday

I slept in this morning, and raided my parents' fridge for breakfast. I did well and just ate leftover veggies with a bowl of my mom's homemade papaya soup. Soooooo good! I just relaxed, watched TV, talked to my best friend on the phone for almost 2 hours. It was such a peaceful and relaxing day. I hung out with my parents when they came home and we had dinner together. Another great home-cooked meal that totally fit into The No Fun Food Life. Yay!

And now... I'm watching Resurrection, haha.... and about to head to bed so I can get up early to go visit my friend in San Diego tomorrow morning!!! So awesome! :)

SoCal Vacation - Part One

Very first stop after a 4 hour drive... my parents' house! My mom made me a homemade feast for lunch and it was so good! She went through the trouble of steaming extra fluffy brown rice w the little husks still intact... there's a special name for it, but I forgot. So I had about 3/4 cup of that with all the other veggie goodies. My parents are mo stay vegetarian. And, of course, slow boiled soup... the broth was soooo good.

After sitting and chatting a bit, I drove on! Went to LA to visit my cousin... and we headed over to Cerritos. We went to 86 Degrees, a super amazing Asian bakery. I bought an Egg Tart, Milk Pudding bun, and a Ham & Cheese bun. I ate the Egg Tart after enjoying Korean BBQ in the additional company of my best friend & her hubby. I also ate some mac salad at dinner and lots of 'rice paper'... which is like big flat noodles, and drank a couple glasses of Hite beer, I'm on vacation! LOL

I ate the Ham & Cheese bun this morning, and now I'm headed off for another funfilled day of adventure!!! :)

Travel Snacks

Today is the beginning of the two week vacation! Two whole weeks!!!

Tomorrow, I will be driving down to LA to visit my cousin and we'll be eating dinner with my best friend... and that's just the beginning! It's so exciting to know I'll be spending so much time seeing my fave people, visiting my fave places, and eating my fave foods... and it all starts when I wake up tomorrow! Woohoo!!

I feel like I'm heading into this vacation with a head start on health. I got on the scale for the first time since Thanksgiving... ready to face the brutal truth and expecting the worst... and I didn't gain any Holiday pounds! Omg, that never happens - it's unbelievable! LOL

So, I've made myself a little No Fun Food Life friendly travel pack... Pistachio nuts, trail mix w. peanuts/almonds/cashews/cranberries, and a couple of Nature Valley crunch bars. The gluten-free Nature Valley Peanut Crunch bars have the lowest carbs & sugar content out of all the boxes I looked at in the grocery store... I seriously spent about 15 minutes in that aisle. There are 13g Total Carbs and 6g Sugar in each bar... I normally wouldn't eat these, but no harm in packing them in case I get a little tired driving or just need the extra boost in blood sugar.

I already know I'm stopping by Whole Foods to get my mom this hand cream she likes and I'll grab a bottle of Kevita/Kombucha for the first leg of the drive. Then, I usually stop by the Starbucks in Bakersfield to get a Venti Iced Green Tea. Yup... everything's planned.

I'm going to try and be as good as I can this vacation, but I already know I'm going to eat some delicious Korean barbeque, dumplings, pho, my mom's home cooking, and then one solid week of my mother-in-law's home cooking.

Don't worry though, I've already planned 2 hikes and will wear my Fitbit to make sure my exertion level can keep up with my consumption level... hehe. ;P

Fixated and Irate

My ob/gyn prescribed Clomid for me based on the data that I've been dutifully tracking, another round of blood tests, and my long history (6 years) of PCOS. She has significant reservations that I am dropping any quality little eggs at all. :( The Clomid will block estrogen receptors in the brain so the body secretes more of it and other hormones essential to a healthy menstrual cycle. I started it in December and there was a drastic improvement in a few things. For instance, I stopped having epic 2-3 weeks of insaaaaaane PMS symptoms. I had like 2 days of symptoms and they were barely anything! Yay!

The down side? I take the pills from cycle days 3-7... which is during my period... and it shortens my already short fuse to non-existent status and raises my fiery temper to volcanic new heights. I think next month I may do everyone, and my career longevity, a favor and lock myself inside my home on the worse days... Sorry, Will.

I totally snapped at a friend at work... and even though she said it wasn't that bad... I KNOW it was bad because of the way I felt during and after the episode. My heart was beating fast, breathing went short and shallow, and I got fixated and irate. ... and afterwards I felt so guilty. Another friend at work likes to get me worked up for amusement. I usually handle it better, but I almost lost it today. I am on a precipice and I have to tread carefully.

I struggled with intense depression, anxiety, and PTSD through my teens & twenties, and this medication seems to be putting me into a bad emotional state for 5 days out of the month. It's hard for me to see my way out of it, even if it's only momentary.

I talked to my desk neighbor at work today about some of my feelings and issues, and he asked me if I would go see a counselor again. And I responded that... at some point, I've talked to everyone about everything and heard all the tips, tricks, and techniques. I just need to walk the walk.

So... I've dug up my Checklist of Cognitive Distortions that I worked on with my last therapist. I use to possess 7 out of 10 on the list... I'll let you postulate which ones.

1) All-Or-Nothing Thinking
2) Over Generalization
3) Mental Filter
4) Discounting The Positives
5) Jumping to Conclusions
6) Magnification or Minimization
7) Emotional Reasoning
8) SHOULD Statements
9) Labeling
10) Personalization and Blame

Now that I've written them here, I can always pull up this post at work to check myself and make sure I haven't fallen back into bad habits.

So, my mission is to make sure I focus on the mental/emotional aspect of my health during those 5 days. In the equation of "eating, moving, and relaxing my way to good health," I can't ignore one leg of the tripod. Lucky for me, today is Day 5, so I will most likely feel like a million bucks when I wake up tomorrow morning. Good night.